Belle

So sorry Nick for your loss of Kitty, I feel you. Our bond with our cats is very special, a true connection and love shared unequivocally. I understand how you are feeling right now, know it will pass and remember that Kitty is not gone but just moved on.. ((hugs)) Belle

Hi Infinity, I know this is not easy for many but just try, whenever you feel overwhelm, dread or anything you are feeling try to watch it, feel it then surrender into it, to me there is no point of resisting and fighting. The reason that I say watch it, you are trying to establish two persons in you, someone that is the watcher and someone that's being watched, its all you. Once you can separate yourselves, then you slowly detach and realized that you have the power to stop it and then healing and recapping becomes easy. Intending for you to find peace.. Belle

Hi ArcaneHuman, Being aware of them is already a progress, next step for you is to feel/sense what they want from you, why they are latching on you. What are you feeding them, why they keep going back and messing you up. Sorry if the words sounds ruthless, but I don't know how to say that in nice way.. To get rid of them is to get rid of the food you are putting on your table.. remove those cramps, food, dessert, all of those, clean your table top.. they will leave you alone. Belle

We do really feel helpless if our minds attack us. Can you see that there appears to be many of you, there is your mind that seems to have its mind of its own, then there is part of you that is feeling vulnerable and crippling with fear, then there is part of you trying to do the white magic to counter punch with you feeling the black magic. But who are you? We can't really solve the problem using our mind the same mind that used to create the problem in the first place. Your experiences are all seems to be in your mind, our mind is powerful don't underestimate it.. it creates the problem and same time it creates a seeming solution and then 'you' are just being tossed from one end to the next but still within the same spectrum, so it just like a roller coaster, it goes up and down but its only in a cycle. So how can we get out from the cycle? I don't think it has a quick fix knowing that there are so many aspects in our energy involve. But having started with recap is great way, you are doing spiral too which gives you would gain clarity, you are taking quicksilver which would help you deal with stuckness in your emotional response, so these would definitely keep you moving out from that cycle. Also try to ground yourself, I mean do some physical activities..it helps clear the mind and anchor you. Belle ps.. I don't downplay the power of praying, me myself coming from a religious background.. but don't think that praying will ultimately solve your problem it will help you find your way.. but it still you will have to do it for yourself.. it doesn't mean that God is mean but He wanted you to see Him as yourself..

Hi EnergyGem, Its great to find other wisdom in different tradition in parallel to what we see and know. Its just boils down the how we find the ways to know, I would like to say that we all have different doorway but at the end we have the same destination. Thank you for introducing that to us, I also believe that physical body is important in integrating all the knowledge. Belle

Hi ArcaneHuman, Yes the world is so familiar what we see today we 'expect' that we see them tomorrow or the next day. So 'expectation' is not the same as intent. We help perpetuate the existence of whatever that 'is' not because of our moment to moment intent but because we had already agree, accept and expect that as part of our reality. Although it could be a combination of 'expectation' and 'intent' for something to keep existing, like when you go to buy cigarette, first you expect that store to be there and you keep on buying help sustain the original intent of the owner. You go to groceries to buy your food, you expect that the products you are buying and the store still exist. Something that already visible and defined to us we 'expect' that it will do the same thing. When you sit in a chair, you 'expect' first that it will hold you up rather you intent to hold it up. We keep the collective intent by supporting it buy patronizing it but we can intent something what we think right... we don't have to always agree what's our reality that has been created and set out. So build your new reality by having clear intent and unbending will, Its like you sewing a cloth, fabric is your intent, the needle is your will.. Belle

Would you be able to split yourself like one of you watching the self that is experiencing the depression so its like one becomes the watcher and then there is part of you as the watched. Then when you can watch your other self don't resist or judged whatever it is experiencing. The fact that you can give attention to your other self can be a form of detachment and later on you can uncover whatever lies behind the depressed self, surely their is a pattern that runs and make it active. Although I understand that you can't stay focus too much but just try. Will to lift yourself even for few moments.. take a baby step to get your life back in shape...

Sorry to hear about that, I don't know the feeling of it so I won't pretend that I know what you been through. However, as I see it it seems like your energy is weigh down is just like there is lack of fire or spark within. I wonder if you have a childhood experience that leads to your depression, perhaps a nexus point or it could be an agreement( unconscious of course ). If you have done spiral 1 class, please revisit the first exercise, it might help you lift, ride the intent of life itself. Belle